Confidence is a trivial matter sometimes
by Casual Voodoo
Summary: My entry for the voltron secret valentine 2017, for the wonderful @S-houta over on tumblr! hope you enjoy it, and concrit is appreciated.


_Fire. Fire and Blood. So much Blood. Please. Help._

Keith swiftly caught Lance as he stumbled of the healing pod, and though it was Lance who had had his lungs repaired, it was Keith who felt like they could breathe again. Lance looked around in panic, before settling into Keith's embrace.

"Lance." The word on its on was just a name, but as it slipped out of Keith's mouth, he said it like the single word, so heavy with emotions, meant the world to him. Lance laughed shakily, still tired and sore from being locked up in the pod. His eyes seemed droopy, and his face was mostly slack. Keith seemed uneasy by this lack of energy- when was Lance _not_ hyperactive?

"What?" He said drawled dumbly, in a weirdly high voice. He knew what. Keith _knew_ he knew what.

"Why did you do that?" He asked sharply, anger starting to bloom like a red flower. Lance looked subdued and started fiddling with the sleeves of the healing pod suit, still in Keith's arms. Still shaking.

"Better me than you Keith." He said with a quaint smile, as if that said it all. Keith froze.

"You almost died Lance; You _did_ die for a second there. Your heart-" he choked out, as if the words physically pained him. "Your heart _stopped_. We barely made it in time Lance."

"I wasn't about to let that beam hit you." Lance quipped, slowly regaining his strength. He knew he couldn't get out of this one; honesty was the best policy here, he reasoned.

"You should have." Keith said, ever cold and precise. Lance was still, almost frozen, in his arms, and silently, Keith shirked him off, leaving Lance to wobble insecurely until he regained his balance. Lance ended up making the reasonable decision of sitting on the floor, pointing up at Keith as he turned away.

"Bullshit!" Lance cried. Without warning, Keith whirled around, and despite Lance's fragile state, grabbed him by the collar.

"If you ever try to give your life for me again, I'll revive you _solely_ just so I can murder your sorry ass for it." Keith quipped, his face burning and his voice low and quiet.

As Keith stalked out of the room, he turned back all but once, to tell Lance to go find the others and let them know he's awake, leaving Lance to deal with the fallout, wondering what the hell had just happened

Lance had found Hunk first, alone in the kitchen, staring at a plate of food goo like he couldn't bare to eat it.

Hunk had cried, a blubbering mess that couldn't be rivaled. He had held on to Lance for as long as he could without Lance needing to breathe, until Allura, wearing a face that suited a stern mother more than the usually energetic and witty princess, walked into the room. Hunk let go of him almost immediately and gave Lance a pat on the shoulder, and a borderline pitiful look before walking away.

Lance took one look at the unbridled anger in her eyes and gulped, starting to assess his chances of getting out of this room alive.

They weren't high.

"What the _quiznack_ was _that_ Lance?!" She yelled, striding over to him inexplicably quick to smack him around the side of the head. "You can't just _do_ things like that! Human are too fragile!"

"Ow Allura!" Lance said, trying to bat her hand away after smacking him. She completely ignored the futile gesture and wrapped him in a hug.

"You're not allowed to die." She pouted. "It's against the paladin code." Lance tried to stifle a laugh and hugged her back quickly.

After a couple of seconds, she retreated "That was all. But seriously, Lance." Allura said, a serene smile plastered on her face, the perfect picture of calm.

"If you ever risk your life like that again, then I'll end it for you."

Oh.

She strutted out of the room like a run way model, leaving Lance shaking in his metaphorical boots. Allura could be _terrifying_ when she wanted to be. Jesus Christ, Lance was beginning to wonder why Voltron was the revered super weapon when it could _easily_ be Allura.

"Come on," Hunk said finally, after finishing his food goo. "Let's go find the others."

Pidge, to say the least, was _not_ impressed with Lance's 'little stunt'. They expressed this by being, admittedly, quite violent and nearly bursting into tears at multiple points.

"So," they sniffled, after a mini breakdown about how Lance was _such_ an _idiot_. "Have you seen Keith yet." Lance blinked a couple of times before answering.

"Yeah, why?" He asked, as if treading on egg shells for a reason he didn't quite know yet. Pidge snorted and smirked.

"He was only waiting outside your pod for the full two weeks." They said coyly, nudging Lance with their elbow as he flushed deep red. He had been waiting all that time? Wait... did they say _two weeks_? He had only been out a _day_ after the explosion; he had been in a coma!

Well, Keith did say his heart had stopped.

Keith.

Why? Why had we waited the full time? Was it because Lance had took a hit for him? Yeah, that had to be it. They weren't exactly close; compared to the rest of the team, they were distant at best. Maybe Keith was feeling guilty. Keith couldn't possibly care... right.

Lance decided the best course of action here was to change the subject.

"So," He said as casually as he could, which in hindsight, considering his profuse blush, was not very. "How long have you been working on this little project? You seem tired pidgeotto."

"Sleep is for the weak." They dead panned without sparing a glance from the glowing computer screen.

"Yeah, well Pidge, my buddy, my pal," Lance replied tersely. "You look like you can sleep for a week." Lance ruffled their hair with a fond smile on his face just as Shiro walked in. Shiro chuckled at the gesture, as Pidge screeched trying to get Lance's hand off their hair because _they were not a child god dammit!_

"I agree Pidge." Shiro said. "I hate to be the buzz kill, but staring at screens that long is unhealthy, and you need rest." Pidge harrumphed good-naturedly, and went to leave the room, just as Shiro called out to them: "And _please,_ actually go to _bed_ Pidge."

Shiro turned to Lance and let a hand rest on his shoulder. "I'm glad you're ok Lance, you had us all worried sick." Lance laughed sheepishly and rubbed the back of his neck.

"Yeah," Lance said. "Must have been a pain not being able to form Voltron." Shiro frowned and shook his head.

"That's not what I meant Lance." Shiro's voice was stern but soft spoken. "We were worried about _you._ " Lance pursed his lips, letting a little 'oh' sound fall out. He looked down at his feet, shuffling them awkwardly, before gasping in surprise as Shiro grabbed him into a hug.

"Thank you for saving Keith." Shiro whispered. "He's like a brother to me." Shiro pulled away from the hug and gave Lance a stern look, wagging a finger in Lance's face.

"But if you think it's ok for a single _second_ to think that someone on this team is worth more than you then we're going to have issues."

Oh.

After _finally_ escaping Shiro, and then Coran's admittedly frightening attack of hugs, Lance found himself finally alone.

Sat in his room, basking in the silence he used to _beg_ for as a kid in a slightly insane household, but now hated with a passion. Where were the manic screams of his siblings? Where were the shouts of his old grandfather who barely moved from his chair as he watched the football? Where were his mothers yells to ' _come help in the kitchen Lance or I swear to god you're not getting fed!_ '? Lance loved the new family he'd found in the paladins of Voltron, but the sting of the pain that he could never fit in and be as amazing as them stung, raw and hard. And they were all so quiet; so painfully content to leave him to his own devices! Were all families like that? Before flying into space with a flying blue lion, Lance didn't think he would be able to imagine it. But as he sat here, the calm silence driving him slowly up the wall, he could imagine it; and there wasn't much worse than this.

Finally done with the 'silence' shit, Lance flung himself towards the door to find someone to talk to, right at the moment when Keith went to open it, effectively hitting Lance on the head.

"Oh, _fuck,_ Lance!" Keith cursed, as Lance toppled backwards. Keith went to catch him but ultimately failed. Lance fell to the cold hard ground like a sack of bricks.

"Are you ok?" Keith asked, his voice tinged with concern and laced with worry.

"Yeah, yeah, I'll be fine." Lance murmured, trying to bat away Keith's tentative hands. Keith was persistent however, and dragged Lance up onto his feet before guiding him over to the bed. He completely ignored Lance's muffled protests, and as Lance tried to wrangle his way out of Keith's arms, he couldn't help but feel deja vu over this mornings events. Remembering Keith's cold, merciless tone, Lance tried to get away with new vigour, but no avail. Keith's grip was like iron. Cold, hard iron.

Well, Lance mused, At least it was better than silence.

"Are you ok?" Keith asked again, now they were seated on the bed. Lance shoved himself away from him, trying not to show his blush.

What was _up_ with Lance today? Why was he blushing so much?

"Yeah yeah," Lance said. "I already told you I'm fine."

"You're fresh out of a healing pod Lance!"

"Yeah, and I'm _completely ok!_ "

"No! You're _not!_ " Keith yelled, finally loosing his temper, which was admittedly already at it's short, short end. "You jumped in front of a _huge fucking laser_ for _me_ , of all people! Maybe physically you're healed but I don't think for a second you're ok mentally."

That shut Lance up. Until it didn't.

"Yeah well Keith, maybe i'm fine! Mmk, _maybe_ it was just common sense for the most expendable-"

" _Most expendable?_ "

"-Most expendable member of the team to get taken out!"

"Lance how could you _think that_?" Keith hissed, grabbing hold of Lance's shirt, drawing him closer.

"Because it's true!" Lance yelled.

"No it isn't!" Keith yelled louder.

It was at that moment they realized how close they were, and tears started to fall from Lance's eyes. His eyes were blue, a deep, deep blue and full of mysteries; like the ocean, and somehow, the idea of water spilling from them was strangely fitting. If Keith hadn't hated him team mates being upset so much, he might have thought it was...

Beautiful.

"I'm nothing but a 7th wheel." Lance whispered as the tears fell. "I'm _nothing_ but an average boy from Cuba and you? You're always doing cool junk like flying into asteroid fields or black holes! It's not exactly a competition! Everyone has a thing that they can contribute to the team and" Lance sniffled as his voice started to crack. "and I just don't."

"Yes you do." Keith said softly. He seemed oddly... flushed? Lance shrugged it off; it was probably because it was warm in here.

"That's the thing Keith; I don't. Sharpshooter? Yeah _right_. I can't even do a kick without knocking Voltron ass over backwards. Sometimes I think it would be better for everyone if I just went home to my family." Lance said, oddly quiet with subdued acceptance.

"Don't you get it?" Keith asked desperately, thrumming with energy and slightly stammering. "You're like the glue that holds this team together Lance! We were all doing awful without you here! And not because we couldn't form Voltron; it was like we all forgot how to act as a team." Keith cupped Lance's face and looked into his eyes, both trying- and failing- to push down their blushing.

"We need you." Keith spoke softly, and then quieter, but still present: " _I_ need you."

Maybe it was the situation; maybe it was impulse. Maybe it really _was_ warm in the room. It could, possibly even be the unresolved romantic tension. But somehow, it happened.

Lance kissed Keith. Keith's lips were chapped Lance noticed, as Keith let out a small gasp before finally leaning in. They stayed in each other's embrace until they were breathless. Lance laughed a little; the tear tracks on his face were shiny in the light.

"Sorry," He chuckled, slightly breathless still. "That was spur of the moment."

"We're not done talking about this." Keith said, his voice slightly muffled by the fact he was leaning into Lance's coat. Lance let out a sigh.

"Can we be?" Lance asked after a stern look for Keith, he amended: "For now, at least?". Keith nodded as he looked up and smirked at Lance.

"For now then." He said, almost giggling, as he pulled Lance in for another kiss.

Lance could forget about his insecurities for a while, he reasoned, if the stars, scattered in the sky like spilled sugar, could keep shining under the dark blanket Zarkon's far had smothered the universe in.

Just for a little while.


End file.
